It's week 6 and we are all settling into our routine nicely. The kids have more friends and interaction with friends in our new neighborhood than ever before. We have already had numerous sleepovers at the nest and my daughter slept over at a new friend's house as well. Both have jumped into school activities with much enthusiasm. My son has a girl friend now as well which is keeping him very happy and focused. Both seem to be doing well in school and were able to pick up where their last school left off. We are headed out for a week's vacation for March Break! A trip to see Nana and Papa is greatly anticipated. This will not be my first trip alone with the kids, so I am not worried in the least.
Dad introduced them to a new love interest of his and the kids seem pleased that he is dating. They were concerned at first that I would be mad, but once I assured them that I was very happy for daddy and wanted him to be happy, they seemed fine. I also advised the children that I would be going on a date with a friend and they were fine with that too.
I think they feed off our reactions to things. If I were crying or mad or hurt, then they would feel that way. But Mom and Dad are strong and positive and moving forward and they are going with it. The worst thing we could do is be mean to each other in front of the kids or say bad things about each other to the kids. We have family dinners every Wednesday night and the meals are pleasant and used to catch up on the week's events. Mom and Dad are able to chat easily and maintain a friendly atmosphere which is perfect for the kids. In private, we have discussed each other's "relationships" and made sure we each understand where we are in the process so we can listen to the kids and work through any issues or questions that may arise.
The kids are our #1 focus. It's working! I think the key to our success is the fact that our marriage was really over. We were living like room mates. And while this was a decent situation it was showing our children that it's o.k. to be in a loveless marriage. It is not o.k. to live for years in a loveless marriage. We need to live life to the fullest and not settle for anything less! Our children will survive and will be better people for it. I want my children to know that it's o.k. to make life changes in order to achieve complete happiness!
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